Is This Real Life?

Tony La Russa's post-game interview.

I have to imagine that Tony La Russa is feeling a little bit like David on his way home from the dentist.

Post-game interview:

Reporter: "Tony, how do you feel about losing 6 of your last 7 games?"
Tony: "I didn't feel anything."

Reporter: "Mr. La Russa, you must have something to say about your team's lack of offense in recent games."
Tony: "I feel funny."

Reporter: "It is kind of funny how Rick Ankiel keeps getting starts over Colby Rasmus, even though Colby's OPS is over 50 points higher."
Tony: "Ughhhh."

Reporter: "Tony, what do you have to say about Chris Carpenter's 11-hit, 6-run performance against Randy Johnson?"
Tony: "Is this real life?"

Reporter: "How many positions is Mark DeRosa able to play, realistically?"
Tony: "OK, now...OK, now I... I have two fingers. I have four fingers."

Reporter: "Tony, now you're holding up 7 fingers. OK, now stop...stop giving me the finger."

Reporter: "What can you see about this club that is causing the slump?"
Tony: "I can't see anything."

Reporter: "Did Dave Duncan just step on your toe right now?"
Tony: "UghhhAHHHHHHH."

Tony: "Maybe you should get some sleep. It was a long night."
Reporter: "I don't feel tired. Uh uh."

Reporter: "I'm sorry, Tony, but you have us in stitches right now. I don't know what's gotten into you."
Tony: "Do I have stitches? Do I have stitches?"

Reporter: "No, that's just a phrase we use. No, stop touching my microphone!"
Tony: "Why can't I touch it?"

Reporter: "Because it's mine. Do you feel OK?"
Tony: "I...I feel funny."

Tony: "Why is this happening to me?"
Reporter: "I don't know, maybe you should look at your players."

Tony: "Is this going to be forever?"
Al Hrabosky: "I think we need an impact trade."